This week has not been my week. Because I don't have a work schedule, I have no schedule period. I'm just a mess until it's almost noon then I finally get up and get crap done. I mainly do it because Josh gets all stressed out when he gets home and the house is a mess. If I don't have anything to do, I don't do anything. At all. I camp on facebook. So this week has been CRAZY! Not crazy busy, more like crazy I don't know what to do with myself. We have actually been pretty busy with ourselves doing stuff, but nothing has gone my way.
Today was a particularly hard day. We went to a party at the beach for the school thing Gissi and Na'a go to. It was windy so everything was flying every where. I only have 2 arms so I was constantly yelling for my children to "stop that" "don't touch that" "no you can't go to the sand" "don't touch the dog" yadda yadda yadda. My mom was there so she helped a bit. Gissi almost ran to the beach, I thought I lost Gabriel but he went to the bathroom by himself then decided to come out naked for free and Na'a pooped all over herself and decided to scratch while being changed. Gissi kept eating and spitting out food, Gabriel didn't want to eat he just wanted to play, Na'a kept picking food off the ground or off of other peoples plates, you get what I'm saying? It was fun though :) I about had it though when we left. It was perfect timing for my patients and their energy.
Then I didn't get Gabriels school stuff done. I swear these people are so fired! My old doctors clinic has faxed his info 3 times and they still haven't gotten it and they won't sign the papers for me because they haven't received the fax! I've called them a million times and the person that can help me is NEVER IN! And she never calls me back. So I quit. I think I'm changing doctors or clinics.
On top of all the tantrums and crazy day we've had and the no luck with Gabriel's school papers, Josh leaves his card in the atm machine. This is the breaking point for me. I am so furious it takes all of my controlled energy to not scream in his face. I am out of wipes. I am down to my last wipe. One stinkin sheet. And this guy tells me we can't buy anything because he left his card in the atm machine. We go back and its not there. He goes to work and I go home crying. I don't want to ask my mom because she just bought me a vacuum and some other stuff and I just deposited my last 20$ into my account to bring it back up.
I get on facebook and I get on twitter and I feel like ranting. Like usual. But instead I tell myself it's ok lala, it'll work out. I call the bank and they tell me we might not get it back for like 4 weeks..... I am just so upset I don't even know what to do with myself. I'm sitting at the computer not even crying because I'm just soooooooooooooooooooo upset. What am I supposed to do??????? So I sit there and convince myself that its ok everything will be ok. How? I don't know but if I think anything else I'll do something I'd regret.
I write Josh a not so very nice letter and I leave. Where do I go? I don't know. Then I get the feeling to go back to BYU and try again... huh? Go back? But we just came from there... I know the feeling and in my head I literally think "is this really a miracle where I'll go back and it'll be there????" naaaaah, no can. But I do it anyways. I figure why not.
We park illegally and run to the atm. There is nothing there. I go inside and wait at the help desk. He is helping someone else and I'm just standing there and this lady walks up to me and asks me if I'm Josh's wife. huh??? She then tells me she is the lead for the Holomua this year and knew Josh had applied. I told her he got hired and she said great and left. Another worker came to the desk and asked if I had been helped. I said no and began my dramatic story about how I need a card. They pull out a billion cards and start looking through. I ask if they have a bank card and he says yes. I then ask if he has Josh's and he asks me "do you have your ID?" I freak out and ask him if he has it. He says yes and I literally jumped with excitement! Trying not to scream I asked if he needed Josh and he says as long as I have the same last name he'll give it to me. And he did :)
You cannot imagine how my mood changed in that one instant. I went from crybaby of the century to happiest wife ever! We stop at the front of the building and offer a small prayer of thanks. I have been humbled again. Of course I go home and write a simple note saying I found the card and leave my horrible letter for myself as a reminder that even though my day doesn't go exactly as I planned, God has a plan. I just need to trust in Him. Even though my day was crazy and I ended up coming home crashing (which is why I'm up at this hour), I learned a valuable lesson.
Had I not listened to the spirit and not gone back to BYU, we probably would have waited the 4 weeks. Or canceled the card and got a new one. Even though my day didn't go perfectly and I didn't get everything done that I needed to do, He saw me through the things I NEEDED the most. Like wipes :) Don't underestimate the small things. They make the big things possible. I am listening. Even if it takes me a little longer than most...
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