Josh and Lala Garcia: A New You by BBJ Family Foundation

Last week I had the opportunity of a lifetime. I was able to attend A New You retreat for women by the Barbara Barrington Jones Family Foundation at Brick Canvas . I cannot express how grateful I am to have had that opportunity. One of the first things Barbara wanted to make clear was that all those who were in attendance were not there by accident. We were all there because our Father in heaven had a clear message to share with each of us. I definitely learned mine.

I find it amazing though because we found out about Barbara (BBJ) at the IIPP at BYU-H. It was a program that taught soft business skills, the icing on the cake. I had the chance to speak with each speaker and ask them about their trials, successes and advice on being a mother/wife/businesswoman. I've always struggled with the thought of leaving my children at home and not being there. At the same time, I get crazy and cranky if I don't get out there and do something. I never realized there could be a median. I could find what fits for me and my own family and work from there! All the while BBJ told me about her A New You program in UTAH. Dang it! There was no way I could just fly to Utah for a retreat. And for 4 days? That's way too long away from my kids. Miraculously, we moved to Utah shortly after, and two months before the program, we moved into the same city. Last Monday my husband told me about it (and signed me up without me knowing) and I tried to get in on Tuesday. I was accepted and I found the babysitters/money/supplies I needed to make it last week! Everything seriously just fell into place and I know the Lord wanted me there.

I had a ton of Ah Ha! moments. Things just made sense and I felt like I was seeing so many different things clearly for the first time. The experience I will NEVER forget is cutting my hair. Just in case some of you don't know, I had very big, long, full hair. Curly it went about the middle of my back, straight it went down to my low back almost to my hips. And I loved my hair. I think it was my vanity, my pride, my mask. I had been wanting to cut it (pixie cut) for a long time. I think for about a year I have been contemplating this cut. When I realized this retreat came with a style and cut, I finally found my opportunity! But I didn't realize how emotional it would be. I was so stressed Friday morning because not only had I been telling everyone I was going to do it, I realized I seriously had to decided whether I was going to do it or not. When it came down to it, Nicole at Vivesque was so sweet and patient. She listened to my ideas, my fears, my hopes in this new haircut, and she also gave me practical advice as a hairstylist. After my amazing wash and pressure point face massage, she even printed me pictures as a reference. We decided to cut it to a bob and see if I liked that at all. I can't tell you how stunned I was as I watched my dread locks come off. I had workers, others who were doing their hair and other women from the group come and watch as my hair came off. I still couldn't decided and she let me call my mom, who didn't have an opinion because she said it didn't matter because I didn't brush my hair anyways. I called my sister who simply said DO IT! So I did. And I now blame her for my decision. Lol, I'm just kidding. But I did do it.

Friday morning/evening

I cut it all off. And I cannot express the support and love I felt from all those who attended, from my family, from Facebook/Instagram/Twitter, I just couldn't believe how many people liked my short hair. And so I cried and cried and cried, not necessarily because my hair was gone, but because I couldn't handle that much love. One sweet amazing friend of mine bought me the product they had put in my hair. I was planning on buying it, but she bought it for me and I just couldn't handle that. To make matters worse, the hair salon bought me slippers. Mine were worn, with holes in them and didn't fit. I had just about had it. I lost it and I cried and cried.

Why was this so important to me? Because I have always felt that I can't be beautiful, loved, cared for or the spotlight because people would see me as conceited, prideful, full of myself and a showoff. When in reality, it was empowering for ALL of us. My vulnerability, my "coming out of hiding under my hair", my journey to becoming a new HEILALA, my finding love for myself as myself not because of my hair or any other vain/prideful love, was something we all learned from. Others had beautiful transformations and I came to a realization that I was just full of myself. Not in a prideful way, but because I was so self-conscious that people were always looking at me that I seriously had to hide behind my hair. This new hair cut has forced me to come out of hiding, to be confident and find the self respect a woman needs to hold her head up high and stand tall. I haven't been able to do that, and I am seriously going to fake this hairstyle until I make it. Not because I feel fake, but because I just don't have the confidence, strength, self-love I need to hold my head up high yet. I will get there. Not because I'll keep lying to myself, but because I will NEVER forget the love, the support, the care, the lessons, the experience of becoming A New You.

The sweet BBJ

Barbara Barrington Jones,
I cannot express the gratitude and love I have for you and your team. You have put on a wonderful program that I know women have been empowered from for over a decade. Thank you for not quitting 10 years ago. I know the Lord did it for me and for every woman who has benefited from not only this program, but from all the programs you put on. Your team is amazing. They are so filled with love and light that each member feels their sincere desire to help, teach and love. You are filled with such a light that people are empowered by your being the best you possible. Thank you for teaching me that lesson. I love you!

If you have the chance to attend A New You, the IIPP in Hawaii, or Be the Best You, I encourage you to do it. Your life will be blessed. Not just by BBJ and her team, but by the many women who attend. The struggles I've listened to, the sorrow I've seen and the joy and love I have felt has put my life into a new perspective. To each of my beautiful sisters that were in A New You 2013, I cannot tell you thank you enough for touching my life and sharing a little part of yours with me. I love each of you and have learned so much from you. I know that I am a better person because I have been able to share this experience with you. Life is as beautiful as you make it, and I am determined to live mine exactly as the Lord has planned for me.

XOXO,
Lala